Hitch ABC 8:00 pm ET
Will Smith's charisma is set on high in this enjoyable 2005 comedy that casts him in the title role as an expert on romance who charges a fee for sharing his wisdom with those who have problems with their social lives. The main client (Kevin James) has an eye on a supermodel type, appropriately portrayed by Amber Valletta, but Hitch has his own love problem, furnished by a reporter (Eva Mendes) who sets him off his game.
America's Most Wanted: America Fights Back FOX 9:00 pm ET
Next time you find yourself thinking that good TV never lasts, consider "AMW." It's in its 21st season and celebrating a milestone with this new episode: the 1,000th capture credited to the series. But host John Walsh won't rest on his laurels; as long as there are fugitives to find and viewers to call in tips, those numbers will keep going up.
You Kill Me MAX 10:00 pm ET
It won't slay you, but if you like your humor dry and dark, you'll appreciate this 2007 comedy starring Ben Kingsley as a hit man for the Polish mob in Buffalo, N.Y. Sent to San Francisco to dry out after his drinking causes him to botch an assignment, he gets a double dose of culture shock from the city and his Alcoholics Anonymous group. Tea Leoni and Luke Wilson also star.
Horse Racing NBC 4:30 pm ET
The second leg in the Triple Crown series is run for the 133rd time at the Preakness Stakes. Its annual ready-made story line of the Kentucky Derby winner (whose identity this year was not known at this writing) continuing its drive toward a possible Triple Crown attracted a record crowd of more than 121,000 fans last year to Baltimore's Pimlico Race Course, which was the site of the famous match race between Seabiscuit and War Admiral in 1938.
NASCAR Racing SPEED 6:00 pm ET
The format seemingly changes every year, but the driving philosophy behind NASCAR's All-Star race remains the same: The winner takes all, so go hard until you can't anymore. Some of the stars at Lowe's Motor Speedway tonight are past Cup winners such as Jimmie Johnson and Tony Stewart as well as former winners of this event, including Kevin Harvick last year, to race 100 laps, split into 25-lap segments. That's up from a total of 80 laps a year ago.
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom SCIFI 6:30 pm ET
Gotta love Indy. Every one of his movies has been a keeper. The intrepid archaeologist played by Harrison Ford is back in the 1984 sequel to "Raiders of the Lost Ark." This time, he's in search of mythical stones that are the source of a village's prosperity. Accompanying him in his quest is a pint-sized kid (Ke Huy Quan, "The Goonies") with a bad case of hero worship and a nightclub singer (Kate Capshaw) who screams at everything. Amrish Puri co-stars as the hairless leader of a blood-thirsty cult.
Cold Case CBS 8:00 pm ET
Here we are now; entertain us. The music of Nirvana is prominently featured in this episode, which finds Lilly (Kathryn Morris) recovered from her shooting and primed to reopen a 1994 triple murder. Two teens were convicted, but she strongly suspects they're innocent. Kirk Acevedo ("Oz") guest stars in "Thrill Kill."
Seven Brides for Seven Brothers TCM 8:00 pm ET
None of its songs became standards, but this 1954 musical remains a wonderful feel-good film. Howard Keel stars as Adam, a mountain man who sweeps Milly (Jane Powell), a boardinghouse cook, off her exhausted feet. Now wed and expecting finally to be able to relax and serve only one man, she is horrified to discover he failed to tell her about his passel of cohabiting brothers. So Milly makes it her mission to marry them off, one by one.
CSI: NY CBS 9:00 pm ET
They could have called this one "Knight of the Living Dead." Two dead men, one of whom was dressed as a knight and stabbed with a lance, turn out to have been killed by the same person, and that's not all they have in common. Mac (Gary Sinise) rushes to Peyton's (Claire Forlani) side after her coroner's van is hit and the body inside is stolen ... a body that turns out not to be dead after all. Robert Joy also stars in "What Schemes May Come."
Dark Beauty LIFE 9:00 pm ET
Given that so many Lifetime movies are about women who discover their men are vicious and violent, this new drama could be given a pass under the equal time rule. But that doesn't mean that it's good. Randall Batinkoff ("Christy") plays a successful businessman who falls in love with a beautiful widow. Then he finds out she's been widowed more than once ... under mysterious circumstances. Could we have a black widow on our hands here? Well, "The Black Widow" was this movie's original title. Just sayin'.
Boxing HBOE 9:45 pm ET
Up-and-coming stars get the prime-time spotlight in a boxing tripleheader from Primm Valley, Nev. It begins in the junior middleweight division as James Kirkland (21-0, 18 KOs) takes on Eromosele Albert (21-1, 10 KOs), followed by junior lightweights Yuriorkis Gamboa (9-0, eight KOs) and Darling Jimenez (23-2-2, 14 KOs) trading blows. Then, back in the junior middleweight class, Alfredo Angulo (12-0, nine KOs) faces Richard Gutierrez (24-1, 14 KOs).
Sunday, May 18, 2008
King of the Hill FOX 8:30 pm ET
Luanne, your dad's a jackass. Johnny Knoxville lends his voice to Hoyt, estranged father of Luanne and brother of Peggy. He's a felon with two strikes against him when he shows up in Arlen, which means if he commits another crime, he's going away for good. And guess what. To spare Luanne the loss of her father a second time, her husband, Lucky (voice of Tom Petty), takes the rap in the season finale, "Life: A Loser's Manual."
Knocked Up HBOE 9:00 pm ET
Protection, people! A brief evening of giggles is not worth years of child support payments. In this critically favored comedy, Seth Rogen stars as party animal Ben Stone, whose one-night stand results in a baby. Katherine Heigl co-stars as the mama-to-be -- who apparently never paid attention in school. Paul Rudd, Leslie Mann, Harold Ramis and Joanna Kerns also co-star.
Masterpiece PBS 9:00 pm ET
Nobody knows the trouble they've seen. The village is awash in problems in the third, concluding installment of "Cranford." A tragedy on the railway caps a series of misfortunes including major financial woes for Matty (Judi Dench) and Lady Ludlow (Francesca Annis). And a misunderstanding leaves Dr. Harrison (Simon Woods) with three fiancees. Eileen Atkins and Imelda Staunton also star.
IndyCar Racing ABC 1:00 pm ET
It's called "Bump Day" for a reason. Putting the pedal to the floor and then controlling the car at 220-plus mph won't be good enough for some during the final day of qualifying for next week's Indianapolis 500. Those who make the 33-car field today will be racing in a star-studded lineup that will feature three former winners of "The Greatest Spectacle in Racing," including two-time champ and ballroom star Helio Castroneves.
Accepted HBOE 7:15 pm ET
If you can't get into any existing college, simply create your own ... at least if you're the inventive young man (Justin Long, "Live Free or Die Hard") at the heart of this only mildly amusing comedy. Not wanting to tell his parents he's been rejected by every school he applied to, he invents one -- and does it so successfully, he finds other would-be students applying for "admission" as well. Lewis Black plays a relative who poses as the dean, and Jonah Hill and Blake Lively also appear.
Everybody Hates Chris CW 8:00 pm ET
The good news: Chris (Tyler James Williams) is a big boy now, graduating from junior high and looking forward to high school. The bad news: He's just found out that he and his best buddy, Greg (Vincent Martella), won't be going to the same high school. Terry Crews, Tichina Arnold, Tequan Richmond and Imani Hakim also star in the season finale.
Lost World: Land of the Giants DSC 8:00 pm ET
Sorry, lumberjacks; it's not OK. That's the position of the scientists, filmmakers and explorers at the heart of this new special. To stop a plan to open one million acres of Guyana to logging, they spent six weeks in the South American nation documenting its unique, diverse flora and fauna in a plea for preservation. You get to watch, and the sights are pretty incredible; some of that fauna is huge.
MLB Baseball ESPN 8:00 pm ET
Well, it's mid-May in New York, which can only mean one thing to the city's baseball fans: time to renew the interleague rivalry between the Mets and Yankees. This three-game series at Yankee Stadium concludes tonight, then Derek Jeter and the Yanks and Jose Reyes and the Mets meet up again in Flushing at the end of June. Everyone went home happy last season as the teams split six games, leaving the Yankees with a 35-25 overall series edge.
The 43rd Annual Academy of Country Music Awards CBS 8:00 pm ET
Got testosterone? Although Dolly Parton, Sugarland, Carrie Underwood and Taylor Swift are scheduled to perform, and Reba McEntire is the host, the nominee field at this year's edition of the awards is dominated by the guys. Kenny Chesney is in the lead with 12 nominations, including entertainer of the year, an all-male field whose winner will be chosen by fan votes. Behind him are Rodney Atkins with six nominations and Brad Paisley with four.
The Simpsons FOX 8:00 pm ET
Hey, it's Sideshow Lisa! The elder Simpson daughter becomes Krusty's new sidekick, and she's a big hit. Soon she's hosting her own show and being named entertainer of the year at the Springfield Media Awards. But it doesn't take long before she decides show business isn't really her thing. Bart and Homer bond over a new hobby in the season finale, "All About Lisa."
Desperate Housewives ABC 9:00 pm ET
Big changes are ahead for this show in season five -- think "One Tree Hill" big -- and the two-hour fourth-season finale sets it all up. It's a busy one, with Lynette (Felicity Huffman) facing an accusation of child abuse, the debut of Susan and Mike's (Teri Hatcher, James Denton) baby, and Katherine's (Dana Delany) secret being revealed. Then it really gets intense. Eva Longoria Parker and Nicollette Sheridan also star in "The Gun Song" and "Free."
American Dad FOX 9:30 pm ET
It isn't funny when middle-aged men on live-action sitcoms try to recapture their youth. It's even less funny when a cartoon guy tries it. So feel free to skip the season finale of this sporadically funny animated sitcom, in which Stan opens the house to students on spring break while Francine is away. He falls under the spell of one young woman, and Steve meets the lady with whom he'd love to lose his virginity. Nothing good can come of this.
Monday, May 19, 2008
MLB Baseball ESPN 7:00 pm ET
When the Chicago Cubs score at least four runs, they're unbeatable. At least they were the first 14 times they did so this season. A sexy stat, for sure, but any team that can score (the Cubs were second in runs scored in the National League at this writing) and pitch well (the Cubbies were doing that, too) will win. Watch Cubs right fielder Kosuke Fukudome tonight against Houston. He's good, and he's patient at the plate, which has rubbed off on his teammates.
Bones FOX 8:00 pm ET
Could the Gormogon serial killer have a friend on the inside? Everyone at the Jeffersonian is a suspect when a lab explosion leaves Zack (Eric Millegan) severely injured, and Gormogon's silver skeleton disappears from the basement. And did we mention the mysterious arrival of a human jawbone? Emily Deschanel and David Boreanaz also star in the season finale, "The Pain in the Heart."
The Bachelorette ABC 9:02 pm ET
She's calling the shots now, guys. The fourth season's bachelorette is one of Brad Womack's prospects from last fall's edition of "The Bachelor." She was in the final two, but Brad turned them both down. Now DeAnna Pappas, a Georgia real estate agent, is on the other side of the table, selecting a new gentleman friend from a field of 25 hopefuls. Chris Harrison returns as host.
Kindergarten Cop HBOE 6:00 pm ET
He may be better known for the one-liners he throws out in his action-hero roles, but movies such as "Twins," "Junior" and this 1990 charmer have shown us he can carry an entire comedy, too. In this one, he plays a cop who goes under cover as a kindergarten teacher to get close to the son of the bad guy he's after. It's got Ah-nuld. It's got cute kiddies. What more do you need?
Gossip Girl CW 8:00 pm ET
No more Ms. Nice Girl -- not that Blair (Leighton Meester) ever was the poster child for sweetness. In the season finale, though, she's on the warpath, ready to take down Georgina (Michelle Trachtenberg) and protect Serena (Blake Lively) from further harm. Lily's (Kelly Rutherford) mind is on Rufus (Matthew Settle) as she prepares for her wedding. Serena tells Dan (Penn Badgley) the truth about her past in "Much 'I Do' About Nothing."
House FOX 9:00 pm ET
It's not the first time House and Wilson's (Hugh Laurie, Robert Sean Leonard) friendship has been put to the test; you try being best buds with a misanthropic pain patient with a drug problem. But it's put to the ultimate test in "Wilson's Heart," the conclusion of the two-part season finale. House struggles to regain the memory he lost in the bus crash in order to save a patient's life. What's locked in his head could change their friendship forever.
Murder on Pleasant Drive LIFE 9:00 pm ET
An unusually strong cast elevates this fact-based thriller starring Kelli Williams ("The Practice") as Deanna, a single mom who teams up with her Aunt Sherrie (Amy Madigan) to search for Deanna's mother, who vanished shortly after marrying a new man (Adam Arkin). Their investigation turns up some troubling news, such as the fact that the new hubby's first wife also disappeared under mysterious circumstances several years ago.
One Tree Hill CW 9:00 pm ET
Fans who have come to expect drama-intensive season finales from this show won't be disappointed by this one. As Brooke (Sophia Bush) struggles with the effects of her decision to give up her baby, Lucas (Chad Michael Murray) feels the aftereffects of the game-night incident. Peyton (Hilarie Burton) hears about someone from her past. Haley (Bethany Joy Galeotti) has a breakthrough in "What Comes After the Blues."
The World Is Not Enough SPIKE 9:00 pm ET
James Bond sees action again -- in the persona of Pierce Brosnan for the third time -- in this 1999 adventure. The British agent stays close to the daughter (Sophie Marceau) of a murdered oil tycoon, since her former kidnapper (Robert Carlyle) is suspected of masterminding the killing. Denise Richards plays a nuclear expert, and the late Desmond Llewellyn literally bows out as weapons genius "Q" (with John Cleese replacing him).
Two and a Half Men CBS 9:00 pm ET
It took a while for Charlie (Charlie Sheen) to start paying attention to women his own age, and the season finale takes things to the next level, as he develops an attraction to a self-help author who's considerably older. It doesn't hurt that she's played by the 50-something and still fabulous Susan Blakely. A school assignment has Jake (Angus T. Jones) at odds with his dad (Jon Cryer).
Rules of Engagement CBS 9:31 pm ET
David Spade wants to date a model. Where have we seen that before? Oh, only on seven seasons of "Just Shoot Me." Fans of that smart sitcom will probably feel nostalgic for the plotline the season finale gives Spade's character, Russell, who gives Audrey (Megyn Price) the use of his apartment for a photo shoot, hoping he can hook up with a model. An uninspired, recycled plot for an already-stale show. And the other story lines -- Jeff (Patrick Warburton) buys his dream car, and Adam and Jennifer (Oliver Hudson, Bianca Kajlich) set a wedding date -- aren't much better.
